By Dr Pola Singh | Malaysia |
I recently found myself at the Tat Khalsa Gurdwara Sahib, Kuala Lumpur, surrounded by the hum of prayer and the steady rhythm of tradition. But my attention was stolen not by the ceremony, but by a small, five-year-old cute girl.
In the quiet of the House of God, I watched her approach her father on the men’s side. Without a word or a nudge from anyone, she wrapped her small arms around his neck from behind, leaning her weight into him in a spontaneous, grounding hug. A minute later, she drifted to the women’s side to find her mother, repeating the same silent gesture of devotion.
To her, this wasn’t a “performance” of affection. It was as natural as breathing. She felt safe, she felt seen, and she was simply tethered to her world through those hugs.
As a 77-year-old granddad of two, I watched this scene with a mixture of mesmerisation and a twinge of envy. I noticed the parents remained somewhat nonchalant; they didn’t pull away, but they didn’t overtly reciprocate either. Perhaps these hugs are so frequent in their household that they have become part of the daily ‘noise’.
But from the outside looking in, I saw a wonder.
I wanted to whisper to them: “Do you know how lucky you are? Do you see the wealth you hold in those small arms?”
We are all born as clean slates. What this child demonstrated was not just ‘cuteness’—it was a public harvest of the seeds her parents have spent five years planting. You teach a child affection, and they become affectionate. You show them kindness, and they reflect it back to the world. That child was a walking testament to the love she has received.
Looking back at my own journey with my two children, now adults, I find myself in a moment of humbling reflection. Did they hug me like that? I’m sure they did. But like the parents in the Gurdwara, I suspect I took those moments for granted. I was likely too busy providing, too busy planning, too busy being a parent to actually savour the magic of being loved by a child.
In the Sikh faith, we say Waheguru—praising the wondrous Giver of Knowledge. As I watched that little girl, I felt certain that God was smiling down from the altar, blessing that family and the way the parents had brought up the girl.
My message to young parents is simple: Savour the magic while it is in front of you. Do not let the frequency of a child’s love dull its impact. These spontaneous, innocent gestures are the purest form of prayer. Don’t just receive the hug—feel it. And respond.
To that little girl, thank you for capturing my heart and reminding a senior that the best things in life aren’t taught through lectures, but felt through the quiet, certain embrace of a child who knows she is home where she feels safe and secure.
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Dr Pola Singh, who retired as Maritime Institute of Malaysia director-general in 2011, is also the author of ‘Uphill — The Journey of a Sikh-Chinese Kampung Boy’
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