By Harwinder Singh | Opinion |
With winter now here on the shores of the UK, we can (hopefully) declare that this year’s wedding season has come to a close – respite from those weekend scrambles to leave the house early and to find matching pairs of socks (sans holes preferably!) This last year saw new levels of grandeur being set in South Asian weddings with the marriage of Anant Ambani whose nuptials spanned a number of months, drew global media attention, featured a who’s-who of business, politics and entertainment in attendance, and cost anywhere up to an estimated, eye-watering, billion dollars.
As Sikhs have criss-crossed the globe in recent decades, our cultural practices have evolved – shedding a few customs that are no longer deemed relevant, whilst gaining umpteen more elements perceived to be more relevant to our new, host countries. In our Year 1 Sikh Studies course, we have a class devoted to marriage in the Sikh way of life, where students are encouraged to explore and discuss their experiences of weddings to the backdrop of learning about the Anand Karaj. One such new innovation brought to my attention by a Canadian Sikh is the ‘Jersey Party’, an event where invitees are encouraged to attend wearing their favourite sports team’s shirt. Can’t see it catching on in the UK, although would quicken the inevitable uncle fight after a few drinks!
There is a lot to be appreciated in a Las Vegas wedding – something that my wife and I learnt as we weighed up forgoing the stress of a traditional desi event after our engagement. We were fortunate to have supportive parents who agreed to a simple, no-frills wedding in the end, which is exactly what is on offer to couples that wed in Las Vegas. What does this have to do with Sikhdom? The Anand Karaj ceremony as we know it today was formalised (not invented) in the nineteenth century by reformers as a direct response to the opulence and excesses seen in the Sikh Kingdom of the time. They centred the ceremony around Gurbani, relinquishing the baggage that took up people’s time and money, returning the notion of marriage as a part of our wider lives, not the be-all and end-all happening of our lifetime. Has the time come for re-introspection for Sikhs today?
People can spend their money whichever way they like, however the staggering and ever-increasing cost of weddings is becoming difficult to ignore. We need to balance this alongside ensuring we have strong Sikh institutions; research that the Sikh Education Council will shortly release showcases the dire financial situation of the majority of Sikh institutions in the UK, headlined by our finding that annual expenditure on Sikh weddings now far exceeds the total annual income of all Sikh organisations with charitable status. Is this a damning indictment of our commitment to the Panth today, or a representation of where our priorities now lie?
What do you think the Sikh ‘Vegas’ wedding should look like and would you have one?
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Harwinder Singh is an educator and writer volunteering for the Sikh Education Council. The article first appeared at his LinkedIn account.
RELATED STORY:
Anand Karaj: A marriage ceremony with a difference (Asia Samachar, 17 June 2024)
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