By Mohan Singh Rendhawa | Opinion |
FINANCIAL CHALLENGES
Young couples have very poor personal financial management skills. This is also a major factor that contributes to break up of marriages. Many young individuals have been declared bankrupt due to over use of credit cards. In the 20th century we only spent money we had. Now we spend it in advance.
INDIVIDUALISM
We live in the 21st century armed with advanced technology. However, our human brain is still the same as it was when we were living in caves in tribes. People hunted together and defended themselves as group.
Up to the 20th century, living in extended families was very common and it met the needs of the caveman brain that we have. People were independent but also there was a strong feeling of wanting to be interdependent and helping members of the family and community in their times of need. This acted as a big safety net. People were less anxious and stressed as they always had help nearby.
Our Punjabi society has changed over the years. Today the trend is ‘Me, I and Myself’. Others can come later. This new trend of thinking is that, I have only one life and I want to make the most of it. This belief has created a selfish nature among some individuals in this 21st century. It is very difficult for such individuals to give. They take more than they give. They prefer to move out and live away from their parents and other close relatives.
PART 1: Sikh Youth Challenges: High divorce rate, tough finding partners
This practice has deprived young children the company of their cousins and other family members resulting in many single-child families or families with a maximum of two children raised in isolation from other family members. This results in isolation and not having any opportunity of cooperation and support from family members due to self-imposed exile.
The lack of the presence of grandparents close to the young grandchildren has deprived the transfer of traditional cultural values and transfer of Punjabi language speaking skills. Grandparents, when they are around, also act as peacemakers for their grandkids and help to teach the art of conflict resolution.
The lack of an opportunity to resolve small conflicts as children have a compounded effect in adulthood. The attitude most common among such people is my way or the highway. So when there is a conflict in adult life they walk away.
MISSING COMMODITY: WARM HUGS OF GRANDPARENTS
The warm hugs given by grandparents was the comfort and a source of the love hormone oxytocin.
The traditional Punjabi way of giving a bear hug is also being practiced less often. People used to feel good after this bear hug because the bear hug tradition of the Punjabis has some scientific basis. According to science giving a warm hug produces beneficial hormones.
Hugs are supposed to lower blood pressure and heart rate, while improving cardiovascular function. Hugs decrease cortisol, making you less stressed and allowing for improved sleep. Hugs are supposed to boost oxytocin in our bodies which is associated with feeling happier.
In those days, when family members met, it was common to give a warm hug. Today, the practice is slowly giving way to a handshake or simply saying ‘hi’.
Grandparents used to be the people who were most generous with warm hugs. Modern mums and dads are too busy with their work and other work at home to be relaxed enough to share a hug.
Mental Health Issues
Mental health is a big challenge faced by young adults in Malaysia. Anxiety and depression are the most common mental health issues. Young Sikhs are also not spared of these as young lives are today very stressed. Due to the pressure to excel in school and in university, leisure time is limited.
Sleep deprivation is another cause. Long hours are spent on social media on devices. These are the contributory causes of mental health issues.
A study was carried out to identify the mental health level of Malaysian students. A total of 810 students were chosen at random. The Depression, Anxiety & Stress Scale (DASS) study was developed by the Ministry of Health. It was found that more than 68.9 % of the students had moderate to high levels of psychological distress. 72.7% faced anxiety and 60.6% were found to be depressed. It was also found that 42.8% had loss of emotional control.
The DASS developed by the Ministry of Health Malaysia is available online, our young people need to be encouraged to do a self-evaluation by completing the list of questions in this inventory and seek assistance to overcome their problems if their score is negative.
Author: Lt. Col. Rtd. Mohan Singh Rendhawa is a Fellow Institute of Personnel & Development UK and also a Fellow of the Institute of Public Relations Malaysia. He served the RMAF for 27 years and has been a corporate trainer for 28 years after he took his early retirement from the RMAF. The views of this article are the personal opinions of the writer.
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